yep, that's right, kiddies. today, we're gonna learn all about a certain brand of human parasite whose purpose still eludes your teacher after extensive years of study.....who's that again??
the P-i-m-p....okay! we'll start off with a popular definition: (n) a young (usually black)male who makes his living by "holding" the money of several (usually white) prostitutes. his major duties include chauffering(pink cadillac?), "motivational speaking"(WHACK SLAP "bitch") and procurement(eg dope, clothing, food, motel rooms). also, collective bargaining("if you guys look the other way, my bitches'll give you free blow jobs").....scouts prospects for future business ventures. allegedly "protects"(although the particulars of that remain very hazy for this writer).....in any event, it seems that this culture cannot think of a FEMALE prostitute without also picturing "her pimp"....people believe they are somehow an integral part of employment as a sex-worker in the world today....
okay, so, that there is BY FAR the most charitable picture i shall ever EVER paint for you of a pimp. read it, love it, toss it aside; now i'm gonna tell you the truth, as i learned from personal experience.
1)pimps do not actually help a girl find work. that part she does all by herself, the same way all the free-agent girls do it: stand on the corner in slutty clothing making eyecontact with motorists. guess that's why pimps are also totally useless as "protection" against sickos, whack-jobs, and sadistic lust-murdering pricks of all sorts....weasel-boy ain't IN the front seat of that car with ya when it really counts! might kinda dampen the mood if John saw where his money was really goin......
2)not all "girls" have pimps. i did not, and i was just as much a ho as the rest of em....yeah, that's right i was--throw a fucking rock if you don't like it. block me from your stupid myspace page; it's been done before.....now where was i?
3)pimps are pussies, for the most part--they're used to dealin with dumb chicks who don't ask a lotta questions(yknow, like "why exactly would i want a pimp when i'm doin just fine on my own??") or beat-down chicks who are afraid.....they operate like the leader of some ratty-ass cult, dictating from on high....and they don't really have all kinds of glamorous style, for the most part....they live like poor white trash outta some welfare motel. they are transients who are a little bit schooled in the art of mind-control and "voluntary" captivity.....like cults, they often kidnap recruits for the initiation rites and demand all worldly possessions and earnings. you get separated from the herd and progressively brainwashed.....but seriously, why would anybody go to one of these losers in the first place??
i asked so many little girls as we stood out on the corner, and never seemed to find an answer.
now, there's another story i'd like to tell you: a story about the real life of pimps and their "bitches".....i got a firsthand peek into their life in a way few people do, you see....as a young teenaged girl workin the streets, i was every pimp's potential recruit....i tried to avoid confrontation with the "real" businessmen and swindled the wannabes.....for the most part, i stayed safe, but one summer morning, i got taken literally for a ride, against my will, by this punk-ass black dude in a mercedes by the name of Chance. why would he go by a dog's name? i got my "chance" to ask him, hah.....
but that story, i'm gonna save for later....i'm tired of typing and i've got stuff to do......before i go however, there is one thing i wanted to tell y'all: back in those days, i saw all kinds of kids workin the "boy block". i always got on with them far better than i did with the "owned" females....funny how i never met a male hooker who had a pimp....
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